Today I’m all about personal growth. Just 5 years ago I was at lost with whom I was. Here I was a former professional boxer and a TBI (traumatic brain injury) survivor and get this; I was 350 pounds! There was no way I could move on in my life and walk out into society. Very insecure I was, dealing with clinical depression, depending on doctor’s medications, psychotropic drugs, living in and out of rehabilitations which I called it the “Asylum” because I was there for cognitive learning. How to live my life out in society again, learning to give up control.
I was always in a hurry trying to do the right thing in life. Have you ever felt in a hurry and before you know it, we are already in the midst of trouble. I was already gaining weight, having suicidal thoughts rushing through me. Just in those five years, I was running away from the man above whom I call God. Each and every day training myself for a happy life, having the courage to change, every day asking God to take me, give me guidance, lead me the right direction. I waited for His answers; it was taking a long time for me to see what it was that God wanted me to do. I knew some where I will face difficulties and setbacks in my life and today I can say I rededicated my life to Christ so I can now mature, a time of transformation.
Simply my own private, personal belief about what is most important to me, finally taking full responsibility of my future.
We may think we are doing the right thing, but the Lord always knows what is in our hearts doing what is right and fair pleases the Lord more than an offering. (Prov 21:2-3)
Ask and you will receive, seek and you will find; knock and it will be opened to you” (Matthew 7:7)
So many people want to change how they feel, but they don’t know how. As for me, the fastest way to change how I feel about anything is to change what I’m focusing on today. I once was told “there’s always a way to turn things around if we are committed.”
There is something that I have to learn in order to grow and to expand. Everyone is my teacher and I learn something valuable from each person I meet today. In the school of life everything that happens to me is a teaching. To make a conscious decision, I am going to stay in a positive frame of mind. We must decide to be good to ourselves, so society isn’t scary anymore. We have to let go those bad feelings, it means a new life, allowing pleasure to enter. No challenge will go unmet, we should never acknowledge defeat.
I share openly from my life experience, entering a new life with awareness and change striving for improvement in my character and ability by doing Tai Chi and Qigong Fitness. I’m now finding ways to look for a solution and not fault in life, another way of freeing yourself from fears of failure and to stand strong and strive to do what’s right in all areas of your life. We are in a position to stand and I do mean to stand strong. Some of us know we cannot pretend that life is all glorious. Right?
As a woman we are in position of change in our lives and we not only endure physical bruises, but non visible pains endured rested squarely in the business of political reasons and we try to make a name for ourselves, we women warriors strive to go deeper for our personal identity through our experiences in life today. We do have a story to tell, to strive for greatness and being true to our individuality to move forward.
I’d like to share with you that, I went to Church this morning and prayed for the Almighty to keep me standing strong and not give in as a black woman. I learn to give up control, I begin to accept change, trusting myself and accepting others as they are. I am moving my mind and body through self discovery by doing Tai Chi and Qigong Fitness this evening.
The mind is always talking to itself, about life, the world, our feelings, our problems, and other people.
Our little voices continues to speak, it’s never quiet. By my experience when the inner voices speak out negatively that we have a negative perception of ourselves and the world. My inner black child celebrates the beauty from within at this moment. I am being at peace with myself, happy and right now I say “I deserve the best in life” that each and every day I am getting better by doing Tai Chi and Qigong fitness.I am strong black woman and I am healthy today!
My journey begins by knowing myself, experiencing “self discovery” seeing confidence in life and my future increases, it’s important to know that I am worthy in my own way, I don’t need to depend on anyone and I know the Lord is merciful and gracious, He fills my life with good things. Self acceptance allows me to experience a much more comfortable life, seeing my strengths as well as my limitations, becoming more willing to take risk today
Make promises of not indulging in feelings of being defeated or depressed again in life, even though things may look impossible, “we can always turn them around” Don’t you think it’s best to become aware of where we are going in our lives, if we sincerely want to change? From my understanding “we are nothing, that it is God within who does the work”
The photo above tells the story “the power of decision” and it takes discipline to overcome our weakness in life. Have you ever walked into a room that’s filled with high energy and sometimes there’s the ugly energy? Do you pick up on that when going places? I pick up on it and yesterday was beautiful! Being around good vibes, it was instant! We moved our body as we saw fit by doing tai chi and qigong fitness yesterday with good conversation afterwards, having that ability to turn up our energy. I know for sure as we learn to give up control, we begin to accept change by trusting ourselves, accepting others as they are. All I have to say; we are worthy in our own way. No matter who you are, you must take care of yourself. You have to earn for yourself your mental and physical health.
“I found an article by Dr Judith Orloff, M.D. on How to build vitality and stop energy vampires from draining you.”
Dr. Orloff’s Tips for keeping your positive energy high (This article is adapted from “Positive Energy” by Dr Judith Orloff, M.D. – Harmony Books):
- In crowds or stressful situations take a few deep breaths to exhale negative energy from your body.
- Meditate daily to center yourself – visualize roots going through you and planting firmly in the ground.
- Take daily baths or showers to wash off negative vibes. Water is a potent purifier and can get rid of the slimiest of energies.
- Burn sage in a room to purify left over negative vibes. Sage is an ancient purifier. (Many of her patients who work in the entertainment industry use this technique to clear the energy in the room after back – to – back pitch meetings in their office.)
- Eliminate energy vampires from your life
In October 1992, I met Qigong Master Daniel Wang in Westwood, California at the Westwood United Methodist Church. You can say, I was searching for something in my life back then and decided Qigong meditation with Master Daniel Wang would be a new experience in the big city of Los Angeles.
Master Daniel Wang has been teaching people with HIV and he believed the ancient method of Chinese healing will strengthen immune systems to combat AIDS. The first night I had gone to his class and I knew I found something really special, a way of finding my true self, personal power and balancing myself.
I remember September 1994 at the Pacific Association of Women Martial Artists, I ran into a recognized top instructor Master Wen-Mei Yu who has been teaching Internal Chinese Martial and Healing Arts. While I was there at the 17th annual women’s training weekend, Master Wen-Mei Yu has taught us a complete set of therapeutic exercises for preventing and healing pain in the back, neck, shoulders, waist and legs and for treating other ailments. So, today is very important for me to continue practicing the forms that was once taught to me. I have so far been feeling really good health wise, finding peace, flexibility and relaxation.
I was very happy to introduce Tigerlily Mental Training to the community that I live in. Tigerlily Mental Training is open to all and suited to those interested in self health maintenance. There are many different movements, practiced for developing each part of your body, which is important for your health. Most exercise programs focus on exertion and straining as a means to achieving increased strength and endurance.
There are a few things that have helped me to the point of writing this and sharing it with you: The love of the martial arts, the support of all martial arts instructors and Masters, the support of my heartfelt intuitive therapist and counselors from CORE and the tremendous test of my willpower that I have experienced over the past five years after living in rehabilitation center for 9 long months of cognitive learning due to TBI (traumatic brain injury).
First, we must believe something must change. If there is no discipline than threats and intimidation continues in our lives. There are some people who only see what is and then there are some of us who has the determination to grow and believe there is source of changes by reaching a new level of strength. We have to believe we can change, we have to be the source of change. We can’t be fooled by the mask we wear.
“When you are grateful, fear disappears and abundance appears.” (Anthony Robins)
We know exercise is good for us. I’m talking about us 50 plus old seniors. Oh, did I just call myself senior? “Laugh out loud” it is hard to ignore what we feel or can feel what we look like on the outside. But really, how do you feel as we are getting older? Is it time to trust ourselves in trying times? This is the day to look within ourselves, to bring out the excellence we carry. By my experience, I know life is worthwhile and it’s good to live. God says “I am acceptable” and “I am valuable.” I am reflecting on my salvation. I no longer have to be in suicidal mode, I no longer have to take certain psychotropic drugs for manic-depressive illness. I can say, “I’m doing well today!” Making a commitment to live life by exercising at age 50 plus and making peace with your past is what I look at today. I believe women need to look within to see what’s true and not remain victimized by unhealthy habits. As an African American woman it was important to pay attention to what I was doing after my boxing career and a TBI (traumatic brain injury) survivor. I’m keeping it simple today. The journey of change is an ongoing spiritual growth to discover who we really are and what we want to do in our lives. The question is: Have you ever been true to yourself? The truth is, we end up lying to ourselves every chance we get and it becomes a habit where we are feeling so heavy inside, the load just drags us. No one is too fat to exercise, I’m happy with my size right now after being 350 pounds, losing a total of 190 pounds. It’s important to be enthusiastic about working out and finding the right place. I bike everywhere I go; my only means of transportation that I know provides me strength and cardiovascular fitness. I started things off slow and I also listened to my body as well. I use to be shame riding a bicycle at the age 50 years old. Well, I say, this is the best thing that ever happened to me. I’m getting in shape! “You may shoot me with your words, you may cut me with your eyes, you may kill me with your hatefulness, but like dust, and like air I’ll rise, I’ll rise!” (Maya Angelou)
So, as a servant or “practitioner” of spiritual growth or should I say, more accurately in a process of change. I don’t define myself by how many times I’ve been knocked down and I certainly don’t define myself by how many disappointments or road blocks I’ve faced. Taking a risk is a part of being alive I guess. You probably see the desire to change and have the ability to transform yourself.
No matter who you are, you must take care of YOURSELF! Earning for yourself mental and physical health. We can be energetic, mature and very conscientious in everything we do and still maintain control, our thoughts and feelings. Sure, we all have dreams, goals, ideas and plans, we are our own true friend to free ourselves from old nasty habits and beliefs that are no longer valid.
What is Tigerlily Mental Training and why it may be useful for you? I tell you, after five years of examining my life after professional boxing and training in the martial arts. I had the courage to start anew, committed to start my life the way I see fit today. Creating life with purpose now, finding that true balance and living the Christian life, loving God and people. Over all, to be a good steward of what God has entrusted to me.
Tigerlily Mental Training you constantly strive to better yourself, reaching your goals. Having that self discipline to do what’s right. It’s not just physical fitness, its self control, thinking instead of how you feel. My martial art instructor will say to me “Quit going by your feelings” check yourself. I can say it is self discipline that got me to move my body. It is self discipline to write this blog. This is a true test! Not to get comfortable, but begin with honesty, self respect.
Tigerlily Mental Training can be an outreach to improve the negative societal perception. To inspire adult men, women, children and youth to make positive decisions, focus on value. Tigerlily Mental Training is designed to introduce the non discipline to a new way of discipline.
“If we don’t change, we don’t grow. If we don’t grow, we aren’t living life. Be a master of change, rather than a victim of change,” ~ Brian Tracy